Mist spoof
by Howl of a Werewolf
Summary: I'm back with more of my popular spoof series, Rated T, As usual, in my series,
1. Chapter 1

THE MIST SPOOF!

**This is written literary, strait after re watching film itself **

The story opens up pretty basic. As David Dylan was painting a picture of an upcoming movie. Suddenly he and his wife and son. Saw a huge storm from outside the window. The three went downstairs. And thank god they did, because a huge tree broke through the window.

THE NEXT MORNING!

David and his family were looking at the damage made. David was upset about his art being ruined, but wasn't overly angry. "A least nobody is hurt" David insisted. His wife agreed. Suddenly their son Billy ran over. Saying he saw something incredible that he must show them. But before they did they spotted mysterious smoky mist arriving from the lake, and coming from the mountains.

A huge tree has fallen and smashed the family lake house. "OH F***!" David screamed angrily. "Honey not in front of Billy" His wife said sternly. "It ok mom, I already know about all the swears in the book" Billy said, thinking that telling her that, would make it ok. Strangely it did.

"I need to 'talk' to our neighbor, about the damage his tree did" David said. His wife bagged him not to. "I'm not going to punch him… In the face" David insisted. "Just below and stuff" David said, and continued going on about it. "David, you know what he's going to say, he'll say sue me, and maybe we should" The wife said. But David already left.

David saw his neighbor Brent, who was yelling a large amount of swears, as his chainsaw was failing to work. Then he saw David. At first he was going to blame him as planned. But had a change of heart, after seeing a tree had destroyed his new car. And decided to let it go.

David and Brent started driving to the town's grocery store. David also brought Billy along. When the three entered the store they were surprised to find nearly 100 people in there. At one point. Even a few military men came, also looking for supplies. Everyone was complaining about the storm and stuff. Including Mrs, Grady, the town's old lady.

Saying a tree destoried the school. "I guess the army has more important things to do, like building bombs and shit" She said.

A MP official (Military Police) had arrived in the store. Giving the three soldiers a limit of five minutes to get what they needed. While he was leaving. Fire trucks and police cars were riding. Billy was worried about his mom, David calmed him down. But suddenly everyone had stopped in their tracks, by the sounds of distant war sirens. The smoky mist was quickly arriving their way. They saw Dan Dumin running their way continently looking back, and seemed scared. As he got closer everyone saw his face was covered in blood. He ran in the store. "SOMETHING IN THE MIST! Something in the mist, TOOK DAN LEE!" He cried. Everyone locked the doors. Dan told everyone to stay inside. "Screw that, I'm getting my car" Someone said, and ran out. "MISTER NO!" Dan screamed, but the guy didn't lesson. He ran out. But when the mist surrounded him. Everyone heard horrible screams coming from him. Everyone remained silent. Suddenly an even worse scream came from the mens washroom. Followed by a sigh of relief. As a guy with a Mohawk came out. He saw everyone staring at him. "What did I miss?" He asked. Suddenly the entire room started being violently sacken, as if a giant monster was shaking it with its hands or whatever. "THIS IS FUN!" Billy said, not showing fear. Suddenly the violent shaking has stopped. Everyone was trying to guess what the hell just happened. One lady convinced herself to go home to her kids. And left even though everyone told her not too.

Billy was crying his eyes out. David was trying to cheer him up. But it wasn't working.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO/ Tentacles

**In my version TWO people fall victoms to the tentacles. **

Billy was in shock, and was shucking his thumb for self comfort. David into the back room. To check on the genitor. Suddenly he saw what looked as if some huge, was pressing again the back door. Freaking out David ran out of there. He banged into Norm, Olli, Jim and Myon, and that guy with the Mohawk that was taking a dump joining the arrival of the spooky mist, the Mohawk guy always appears skinny and without a shirt on, for some reason. The bunch of them investigated the back room. Ignoring David's constant warnings. Norm volunteered to look outside. The other three, except David and Ollie, agreed and encouraged him to go with his plan. "You going to let this kid die over something that doesn't even matter" David said. "Would you just shut the f*** up" Norm said angrily. "Hey calm down" Ollie said, seeming to be on David's side. "Fine, I'll do it" Jim insisted. "No, it dosen't matter who dose it" David started. "What do not think I'm good enouth" Jim asked. "Hey, I want to do it was my idea" Norm said. "If you go out there, something will come it" David said. "Like what?" Jim asked. "Like whatever was making that noise" David said. "Your just scared" Mylon said. "Plus might be drugged up. You should really watch what you put in you, boy" The Mohawk guy said, even though he himself was opening a bag of crack.

They made up there minds, they began using Norms plan. "So, any boogeyman?" Mylon asked obviously mocking. Him, Norm, and Jim laughed. But suddenly Norms leg was grabbed by giant tentacle. "OH F***! GET THIS FRIGGIN THING OFF ME!" Norm screamed. "BOOGEYMAN!" Mylon screamed.

_In the movie David fights with all his might, for Norms life. And in the end couldn't help Norm. And watched in horror as the poor kid was dragged away, with a horrible scream, and the sounds of being eaten. But here's what happens in mine. _

David grabbed Norm. While the tentacle where grabbing him. They were tearing flesh off him, with some form of mouths. "There's more" Norm said sacredly. And sure enouth David saw dozens of more tentacles coming out. "David chickened out. "See ya" David said, and releashed Norm's hands, leaving him to his fate. "WHAT!" Norm screamed in disbelief. Before being dragged away by the creature. And slowly vanished into the mist, with a horrorible scream before it sounded like he was eaten.

David and the Mohawk guy ran to the genitor. "Closs the door for me" David told the guy. But suddenly the Mohawk guy was grabbed by one super large tentacle that grabbed his leg. Nobody made single effert to help him. And would simply watch as the guy was being violently shaken all around the room, humped again a wall. And quickly dragged to the distance. Ending with the same horrible sound effects, as the way Norm finally died.

"Fine, I'll do it myself" David said with annoyance. And closed the door. The door closed. And Ollie managed to cut off a tentacle piece with fire axe.

The danger was over. The rest of them started leaving. "Don't say anything to nobody… Not yet" David said.

**END OF CHAPTER, PLEASE REVIEW**


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE/300 FEET

David, Ollie, Jim and Mylon ran out of the back room. Nobody seemed to have heard the screaming and stuff, because nothing seemed changed. David ran Amanda Dylan a young woman that volunteered to watch Billy. While David was gone. "Oh my god, what happened?" She asked after seeing his condition. "It's ok, it isn't my blood" David said. He and the others gathered together. "Poor kid" Jim said. "Worst of all, we don't even know what those tentacles where even attached too" David said. "We need to stop it from in" Olli said. "Why?" the others asked. "The entire front of the store is plain glass" Olli said.

Brent ran into David's group. David told him the whole story. Brent looked at the others. "Ya" Mylon said nodding. Brent wasn't buying it. "Seriously David, this is how you're trying to get back at me for the whole tree incident" Brent said laughing. "All of you… putting on a little practical joke on me" he containued. "Mister Norten, for what reason" Olli began until Brent interrupted him. "OH PLEASE! This is pay back for when I nearly got you fired" he said. David containued trying to convince him. But Brent turned violent, until the store manager Robert came in. Brent insisted that David assaulted him. David had enouth. He told everyone the story, about the tentacles. Everyone laughed. "That's bullshit" said a biker that happens to be stuck with them.

_The movie and book has no name for him, just biker. Yes, I did read the book, and even though I'm focusing on the movie. Ideas from the book will be used, such as naming the creatures mostly. Besides, I read it a long time ago, and can't remember much else_.

"Go look" David told them.

David lead Robert, the biker, Brent, and few others into the room. Sure enouth blood was spread all over the room. "Know do you believe" David said. "Not really" Brent said. "BUT THE ENTIRE ROOM IS LITURARY PAINTED IN BLOOD!" David cried angrily. "Ya, well, so is mine" Robert replied. "What about that" David said pointing to the tentacle piece Ollie cut off earlier. "What the hell is that?" Robert thought out loud. The biker poked it with a pole. And it melted into strange acid or something.

The bunch of them returned to the others. "It appears we are dealing with something, beyond normal" Robert told them.

Mrs Carmony believed this was gods doing. "Little Normy and his dork friend. And now we are all choosen to die, for our sins. Jim got angry. "HOW ABOUT YOUR ASS, MEETS MY SIZE SIX BOOT!" He cried angrily. "I'm trying keep you alive, you stupid man" Carmony said. And she containued going on about the so called EVIL god. Until Amanda couldn't take it any longer and slapped her. "That's nice, you can hit her but I can't" Jim said.

Brent led a group and said they will look for rescue. "Can't you stay, Mister Mackey is cooking food on the store barbecue.

Mister Mackey burned his hand. And while Brent and David where talking, he is shown in the background screaming and running around in cycles.

Are you sure about this?

David, there is nothing out there

_Mister Mackey wasn't in the background anymore._

"But let me ask one thing (Holds out rope) tie this around you" David said. "Why?" Brent asked. "To let us know you got at least three hundred feet" David said. "I'll do it" Said the biker. And he tied it around his pant buckle holes. The biker turned to Mrs Carmony. "Hey crazy lady, I believe in god too, I just don't think he's the blood trusty asshole, you put him as" He told her. "You talk that over with Satin when you see him" She replied. The group left on their journey for help.

LATER!

After a while of nothing. Suddenly the rope began getting violently pulled. Clearly the group was under attack. And whatever it was, it was BIG! Suddenly the violent shaking had stopped. David started pulling the rope, only have it turn red, followed nothing left but the bikers lower half. David cut the rope. "Now do you see, Now do you believe?" Carmony cried.

**END OF CHAPTER! Please review, or else I'll sent YOU 300 feet into the mist.**

**Just kidding. :)**


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR/NIGHT ATTACK!

Believing in what she is consistently going on about, as being true. Mrs Carmony has gathered many followers, including Mister Mackey, whose mind was quick to snap. And seems to remain that way. But David still had lots of people NOT on her side, and on his side. Mrs Carmony warned that creatures will come at night, and snatch anouther life. Unfortunately she ends up right.

THE NIGHT!

Giant fly like creatures called Scorpion flies (Because that's basically they are). They are described as two feet long in size. More and more started coming, they seemed attracted to the lights. Everyone put up the lights, being unaware, it'll coast them real soon. Eventually large Pterobuzzerds (large dinosaur like birds) appeared. While eating the Scorpion flies, they broke a hole into the store. Scorpion flies started flying in. It stung a women in the neck. Slowly she started swallowing, and suffocated to death. Unfortunately the danger was only starting. Large hordes of Scorpion flies started flying. And to make things even 'better'. Was the Pterobuzzerds where also flying in. One man was an unlucky victom as the creature ripped flesh off his neck, and ate it, and might of containued eating him.

One guy was shucking his thumb in a corner, while cuddled in a ball.

Anouther guy panicked and locked himself in the bathroom.

The battle was still on. And didn't seem to be ending anytime soon. But thankfully both spieces stopped having more. And at least they only had to worry about the current amount. David beath down a Pterpbuzzerd a containued beating the body for the rest of battle, heaven knows why.

There was only one Pterobuzzerd and five Scripion flies left.

David was still beating the Pterpbuzzerd corps, like he was enjoying it, in fact, he proubley was enjoying it.

The Scropian flies were defeated. And the Pterpbuzzerd was that was left and Olli shot but only injured it. It was only able to limp. And no longer fly.

It limped over to David. Who was unaware, because he was still beating that body. Billy ran over to his dad. But the Pterpbuzzerd saw and roared with what seemed like four jaws, of one mouth. David grabbed his kid and ran out of the way. Olli shot the creature in the head, and killed it. Witch made a few girls screamed because of the noise and stud.

Everything went quite. "Did we get them, did we get them all?" David asked in voice, my cousin Shane usually says sounds like THE PUNISHER. A woman reminded everyone that Mrs Carmony predicted this. "THAT MAKES HER A WITCH!" David screamed. And throws Mrs Carmony outside and she gets eaten. Only to reappear as if nothing happened. David was confused.

**END OF CHAPTER! PLEASE REVIEW**


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER FIVE/SPIDERS NEXT DOOR

Jim, Mylon, The old lady, David, Dan, Olli, and two other guys, one being a soldier. Entered into a store, next door to the store everyone was inside of. It was webby and spooky. Little did they realize, it was owned by Grey Widowers. Large dog sized spider like creators that have the ability to shot out acid at their victoms. Olli began hearing noises. Mostly farts and small roars. Before long they began seeing cocoons with people inside them. Many where Soldiers, and there was also the MP from the beginning. Suddenly MP grabbed Jim. Jim screamed like a little girl and ran from there. The MP began saying it was there fault, and that he was sorry. Suddenly a Grey Wildower jumped in front of Jim. Began screaming. After several hours he was still screaming, and the spider didn't seem to be moving. Until Olli shot it. Jim pointed at the body and containued screaming. "SHUT UP!" Olli screamed angrily. Jim did. The Grey Widowers containued coming. And where everywhere. And so a battle had begun. David managed to kill one with his axe. The military guy has acid burn his leg. And everyone had to carry him. The old lady ran into one but had a lighter and sprayed perfume at the lighter and made a flame flower and burned the spider.

The other guy, one guy was trapped. A Grey Wildower came up to him. He begged to be kept alive. Strangely the creature sniffed him, even licked him, and then walked away. Unfortunately the guy ruined his luck by mentioning it being a ugly. The Grey Wildower must have heard him. Suddenly a pickle jaw was thrown at him. And bunch of Grey Wildower jumped onto him and killed him.

The others contained dragging military guy. But soon realized he was dead. And had to leave him.

The door was blocked by a huge spider. I use to mistake it for a giant Grey Wildower. But isn't. It's one of the huge spiders that attack when they when to the car. Known simply as Large Spiders. And are described as two times the size of a full grown human. This one is mostly hidden in the mist, and isn't fully shown. Olli tried to shot it but was out of ammo. It was up to Dan. As he stabbed his spear into it. And too leave it in the creature. Everyone ran out of there.

**END OF CHAPTER!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	6. Chapter 6

CHAPTER FIVE/EXPIRATION

The survivals ran into the store. Jim was crying. "THERE ALL DEAD!" He cried.

LATER THAT DAY!

Jim's mind has finally snapped. And he has joined Mrs Carmony's group. Who got them to begin chanting. EXPIRATION!

Remembering what the MP said. David's group began questioning the last military guy. David's group found that the other soldiers hung themselves. The military guy not dead. Began telling about the truth of the mist. "Are you this mist is, SOME KIND OF MILITARY F*** UP!" David cried angrily. Suddenly Jim ran in. "I GOT YOU NOW! YOU SORRY SON OF A BITCH!" He cried.

Jim through the guy over to Ms Carmony's group. He told them everything he heard. "Alright the truth is… Scientists where trying to create a window to another universe" The guy said. "WELL MAYBE YOUR WINDOW! TURNED INTO A DOOR!" Mrs Carmony cried. "NOT ME THOSE SCIENTISTS! I was a shit the whole time, I had nothing to do with it, IT ISN'T MY FAULT!" He cried. "Not, his fault… It is nobody's fault. BUT YOU! Are blaming someone else" Mrs Carmony cried. Everyone ran at him, because they heard enough.

**This isn't meant to be funny part here. When I saw this part in the movie I nearly cried.**

**I'm keeping it serious, to show, how the directors prove, the way mankind can snap, and do horrible things to each other, under extreme saturations.**

Everyone in Mrs Carmonys group. Ganged up on the guy and started beating him up. Mister Mackey lost it. And stabbed a knife into the guy three times, and did it in cold blood. The still sain David's group was unable to help the poor guy, from being stabbed again. "FEED HIM TO THE BEASTS!" Mrs Carmony cried. "YA! EXPIRATION!" Jim cried. They threw the guy outside. And locked the doors on him. As he bagged to be brought inside. Suddenly a 50 foot Lobster like creature known as ArachinLobster approached. This is supposedly the same creature that killed the biker. Because it's known for cutting victoms in half, and never seems to leave the car parking place. The ArachinLobster is always hidden in the mist, and never fully shown. "Please" The guy said in tears. Before the creature grabbed him. And the noise of him being cut in half, was heard. "The beasts will leave us alone tonight, but tomorrow…We will have to wait and see" Mrs Carmony said.

**PLEASE LEAVE REVIEWS**


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN/THE END!

David, Amerada, Mylon, Robert, Olli, Dan, the old lady, and a mustached guy, the one had a shotgun in his truck, that the biker went for (Sorry I left that bit out). Decided to try escaping. But the still brainwashed Mrs Carmony's group trapped them inside. "Mrs Carmony, please, nobody means you know harm… Please move aside" David said. Eventually Mrs Carmony lost it even more. Wanting to sacrifice Billy. Until shot in the stomach and injured her. Then excused her by shooting her in the head. Everyone backed off. It is suppose to show that they are no longer brainwashed. But in my option, they also just didn't want their brains blown out. David's group went outside.

The group approached a large van. Olli checked it out. Unfortunately Olli dies brutally here. He was grabbed by the ArachinLobster, And the others could do nothing but watch in horror as he was ripped in half with a horrible scream. Strongly enough the ArachinLobster left after that. But the danger was far from over. The group was ambused by a gang of large spiders. On jumped straight onto Mylon's face and killed him, he made female scream as it jumped onto him. The other kept running. Robert panicked and began running towards the safety of the store. David, Billy, Dan, Amerada, and the old lady where safely in the car. And peeped the horn, seeing if the others where alright, and would able to come along. Robert made in the store. But the poor mustached guy was trapped by the large spiders and as he tried to run, they killed him. "Damn, that sucks" David said. Then they started driving.

Along the way they saw a huge two hundred and fifty foot, Behemoth, as the creature stomped by.

**I WARN YOU NOW! The story does NOT have a happy ending, considering it's based on the movie. **

David thought the creatures where coming. And shot the group to spare them, the horrible deaths. David, having lost everything bagged the creatures to kill him. However the creatures did NOT come, the military did. David had ruined his life for nothing. And broke down screaming at the sky.

**THE END! :(**

**PLEASE LEAVE REVIEWS**


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